Some people have unrealistic expectations. My parents are moving this week, and as I have mentioned before, they are giving us a lot of furniture. The "plan" before I was admitted to hospital bedrest, was for us to clear out and sell the unwanted furniture, and have everything organized before the movers bring the furniture.
With the amount Jason's been working, he's exhausted. He's working nights, and especially on dirty deltas (4pm-4am) gets off work, goes home, goes to sleep, wakes up, eats breakfast and goes back to work. On deltas, I know we won't see him, and that's just the way it is.
On the days where Jay's not working, he's looking after Jakob, and trying to keep things in check. Jakob is an easy child, but it's never, ever easy acting as single parent. Especially when Jakob's routine routinely gets messed with. Put someone who is readjusting to normal sleeping together with a confused toddler, and it's a little chaotic.
My mom thinks that Jason should have figured out all the furniture on his own, while juggling Jakob, or maybe on a day where he's working. Are you kidding me? She definitely doesn't understand what it's like for him. Jay is not a multitasker.
She wants me to get on his case about a million household chores. I flat out told her no. I will never, ever comment on something I haven't seen myself. Who gives a crap if there are a few wet diapers in the garbage? She wants me to add many things to his to-do list. I refuse, because I know how long that list already is. I see the guy a couple times a week, I am not going to ruin my time with him by nagging him about things that don't affect me. I know Jakob is well looked after, that is all that matters.
Then, she got mad at me for not thanking her for all the work she did today at the house. For starters, I was never consulted on any of this. Instead of being sold, most of my furniture was donated to the thrift shop, including a dining set with chairs I know I could have sold for $500. I'm just a little bit choked about that. She cleaned, that's great, I'm thankful, but she expects me, after belittling my husband, to grovel at her feet in thanks.
Argh.
Then, I was pretty much yelling at her, and told her that there's NOTHING I can do from here. Helllooooo, I'm stuck in a fucking hospital, with fluid leaking out of my crotch, trying NOT to have a baby, and you want me to stress out about household chores? Get your priorities right.
She changed the topic to me, naturally. Have I showered today? No, I'm still on IV, it's not convenient. I'm off IV tomorrow evening, then I'll have a shower. Well, have I at least cleaned myself? WTF?? What am I, ten?? NONE of your business, at all. Then she was mad about my level of hygiene, when she doesn't know a thing about it. She doesn't know that I am insanely obsessive about washing my hands, and I use my peri bottle religiously every time I'm up. My sheets and underwear are changed twice a day. Eff off. I reminded her that I'm only allowed on my feet to use the toilet, because if she didn't remember, SHE was the one who was upset that my water broke, and that Ellie might be born mid-move. Sorry, I'll talk to my amniotic sac about that colossal mis-communication.
I was yelling, again...
Then, she says "well, it will all be easier when you're home". Are you kidding me?! No it won't be easier! I will have to ferry myself to the hospital multiple times a day, to be with my daughter, to feed her. "Well, who's going to look after Jakob?" I AM. "you're not going to be able to manage two kids you know..."
GAHHHHHH.
No faith, she has no faith in me whatsoever.
I'm doing my best in this shit-storm. It's actually okay for me to let things go, and not have everything be perfect all the flipping time.
:S
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