Wednesday, April 11, 2012

On Playing Fair

Over the course of the past few days, Ellie participated in a photo contest, run by a local event business, to win a Canucks jersey. We're Canucks fans around here, and Ellie's watched more games than I have in the span of the past year. It was not unheard of to have a television placed at the end of her crib at game time, while she was in the hospital.

Our friends rallied behind us, and their friends, and their friends' friends, to the point where we had almost 700 votes. This morning, we started the day neck and neck, with only one vote between Ellie and her main competition, a very cute little girl, with a big, bright smile. 400 votes ahead of the rest of the competition, it seemed the day would go by in a close race. I never voted for Ellie, I did however vote for all her competitors, all decked out and supporting their team.

Sometime in the afternoon, for whatever reason, Ellie started pulling ahead. Around then, someone started using the main comment section of the contest, to cheer on the competitor. One of my friends posted something along the lines of " Ellie! If you knew how strong this little girl is, and what she's been through, you would vote for her and her family". The mother of the competition posted, what I took as a hurtful comment: "I was under the impression that this contest was about Canucks Team Spirit, and which baby shows the most Canucks team pride, is it not? I didn't realize it had to do with the strength of a particular baby or family". I mean, never did I post to my friends "Vote for us, because of everything we've been through", or "Vote for us because Ellie's tough". I made no mention of any of our struggles, I just posted a cute picture of my baby girl, into a contest so she could win a jersey, and not steal J's!

A nasty lady, I assume was associated with the competition began a very hurtful stream of comments, suggesting that it was an unfair competition, that it clearly wasn't a competition, and suggesting that the competition withdraw from the contest in protest! At that point, she had over 560 votes, although we were leading by 100 votes. With six hours remaining, the game clearly wasn't over, and I don't think it would have been impossible for them to catch up. A bunch of my friends, and even some strangers protested her comments. My last comment was along the lines of "there are still 6 hours left, we haven't won yet, get your votes in. If the Canucks quit in the middle of the game, they'd lose". Eventually her comments, and the comment of the mother were deleted. Shortly thereafter, the contest was shut down, and the organizer announced that both Ellie and her competition would be winning jerseys.

That made me very upset. 

We don't *need* a jersey. We need a lot more important things than a jersey, like a cure for PWS! We can cheer on our Canucks just as loudly without a jersey as with one. It doesn't change how much we love our city, how much we love out friends. I believe in teaching my children how to play fairly, by the rules, with integrity, respect, and good sportsmanship. Rewarding someone for their awful behaviour, especially when that behaviour is aimed at a special needs child, is brutal! 

Edited to add:
I spoke with the organizer yesterday. She was at a family function, and didn't see any of the comments. She always intended to reward two jerseys, and some additional incentives to draw attention to their fundraising event (admission is by donation to Canuck Place). If the contest hadn't turned ugly, everyone would have left a winner. It really is too bad that everyone couldn't have acted like grown up, polite adults.

Edited again to add: the mother of the other contestant asked that her jersey be given to another contestant.  While not the same as an apology, it shows they care, I guess. Or, the mother cares. I don't know about that other lady. And to Isabella, whoever you are, the appearance and disappearance of the link to my blog had nothing to do with this drama, and everything to do with drama related to my "Argh" post.

I've decided to accept the jersey, since Ellie won, fair and square. So, to make up to the Canucks for the lame-o attitudes exhibited tonight, I'm donating $50, the cost of the jersey, to their Canucks for Kids Fund.

8 comments:

  1. It was sick. Plain and simple. Ellie WON. Why? Because both her and her Momma rock. :)

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  2. You are an amazing person! As if Ellie wasn't going to be an amazing little girl anyway, she has the best role model ever.

    Take THAT meanies!

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  3. Wow. That's just...not nice and really undermines the spirit of the contest in the first place. Good for you for handling it with such grace and good will. Not that you would even know how to handle it any other way. Ellie's a lucky little gal to have such a kind and wonderful mommy. *hugs*

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  4. fair and square, thats right. you played fair and you won square! ellie won because she has more spirit in her little toe than most people have in their entire being. :)

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  5. Agreed with em :) Ellie did win fair and square. It is really disgusting how grown adults act sometimes, and I agree with you, I feel bad for her little girl. She will grow up with that woman as her role model... Ellie looked darn cute in that jersey, and I can tell you I don't know either one of you, but I voted for you! :)

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  6. I found out about this beautiful little girl through a friend on a momma's board and I just wanted to say that you handled it with grace and class...and for that I applaud you. We have to be tough to raise our little girls in such an unnecessarily harsh world. <3

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  7. I'm glad you decided to accept it. You posted somewhere that you were going to refuse it and that made me sad.

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    1. Originally, Janis, I wasn't going to accept, because I was under the impression the organizer of the contest was going to buy another jersey just to make the other lady happy. As it is, they always intended to give out two jerseys, and a few additional prizes. Sadly, people didn't play by the rules, and almost everyone lost out on a fun time.
      Ellie did win, fair and square, with a lot of help from our friends, and especially from the PWS community. She's going to wear that jersey with complete pride! And I will always remind her of how lucky she is to have such amazing people backing her.

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